A moment on the hips ...

"A moment on the lips, a lifetime on the hips".

When i was 16 those portentous words were spoken to me by a workmate in her 30's at a store I was working in.

I was probably munching through another bag of chips or more McDonalds at the time.

And when she mentioned those words to be how I did scoff, in between scoffing back the food. I was NEVER like going to gain weight. I didn't like gain weight now despite all the delicious crap i eat, so there was no way i was going to like ever gain weight in the future. I mean like, she might, like, totally gain weight, but like, there was totally no way that was ever like going to happen to me.

Sigh.

16 year old Kellie, there's a reason that with age comes wisdom, apparently, and there's a reason that you should respect your elders.

Because the day that I turned 25 something mysterious happened to my metabolism. It started to slowly disappear. And every year it appeared to retract further from my body. It was like some black hole was sucking it from me.

And it wasn't til I gained a good eight kilograms that i realised something had to be done. Did I stop eating crap? Hell no! Did I start exercising? Double hell no!! Did i just eat less crap? Yes. And for a while in my late 20's that worked. Then 29 hit and love hit and love fat hit and BAM back to 64kgs. So unfair. And this time no amount of eating less crap would work. I had to break out the big guns. The fruit and vege troops were called in to accompany the skinless chicken and mostly fat free red meat I had introduced into my diet.

But did this work? A little. But not so much.

It turns out the big guns aren't always big enough,. Sometimes you have to call in a nuclear bomb. Or as I call it, exercise.

Like a maniac I worked out. Walking here. Getting on a cross trainer there. Giving myself carpet burn everytime I did a pushup or a situp or a sit-still-and-wish-to-die.

And despite the healthy eating, despite the exercise, i couldn't seem to nudge more than a kg off the bod.

Admittedly the sneaky burger and tidbit of chocolate here and there didn't help, but one would think 40 minutes of hard out exercise a day would do something!

Double sigh.

So today I have all but given up. I do a bit of exercise when I feel like it. I still try and eat well, but I see no point in not eating the things I enjoy. The weight seems to be holding at a steady yet unmentionable number. And while I wish i had paid more attention to my elder, wiser coworker of years past. I think of all the burgers and chocolate and lollies and fizzy I consumed while maintaining my weight. And I think that nine years of dieting versus a lifetime of gluttony and curviness was worth it.

A moment on the lips, a lifetime on the hips, and oh what wonderfully happy hips they are.